October 3rd, 2013
“The deepest and strongest
foundation of adoption is located not in the act of humans adopting humans, but
in God adopting humans. And this act is not part of his ordinary providence in
the world; it is at the heart of the gospel.” - John Piper
Jeremy and I have always had a
heart for adoption. Even when we
were engaged, we discussed that we both had this desire. Then, we struggled with infertility
issues. Month after month passed
and my heart ached to be a mom.
Adoption was not a stretch for us- we both love children and it didn’t
seem like a ‘last resort’. A
few months into the adoption process, we became pregnant with Isaiah. It was a beautiful miracle. While we stopped the process in 2009,
we knew that God had only grown our desire to adopt and given us a passion and a
deeper understanding of our call to this at sometime in the future. Then, Noah was born in 2012. Separately and individually, God
kept pressing adoption on our minds and hearts. I couldn’t understand why, as Noah was
a newborn and I was so happy, blessed and content for the time being with my
two little boys. As the weeks and
months went by, I mentioned it to Jeremy and found we were experiencing the
same leading.
For the months that followed, we
talked for hours, researched, prayed, listened to sermons, talked more, shared
this with a few close friends, read books, and talked even more. Then, the week we were going to start
the process, we were hit with some obstacles. Our insurance costs increased substantially, we found out
the adoption tax credit would not be much of a help as we were planning and we
were told by the agency we were hoping to use that there was a 2-5 year waiting
time. I was heartbroken. For one
moment, we thought of not going through.
After all, it would be easier.
It would be so much easier financially, emotionally, mentally, and
logistically. But within the hour,
I felt again a firm sense of knowing that He who has called is faithful. It is a sweet, amazing thing to know
the will of God; to firmly hear
Him speaking to your heart, to read in His Word, His own heart for adoption. Although this is not audible, it is
something deeper, more pervasive and sure than anything else.
That week, I spoke with a friend
who had just adopted a newborn domestically, and she brought me so much
encouragement. To know we are not
alone in this, to know the beauty of this process. I asked her how hard it was… the waiting, the trusting, the
time period when you have the baby in your arms and must wait weeks and months
before that sweet baby is legally yours- the uncertainty of that time… and her
answer was perfect. She said, “Yes
it was hard, but I have never been closer to the Lord than I was during this
time.” Cleaving to Him is a
beautiful thing. And I know that
there is no way to get through this process without that. As I write this, we just confirmed our
attendance for the first meeting that begins the process officially. I feel nervous, scared, excited,
joy-filled, ready and completely unprepared, all at once. But again today, as I started to get
anxious about the financial aspects, He reaffirmed that He will provide. He
will take care of us- most likely in ways I don’t expect.
So…why are we adopting? This is a multi-faceted answer, but the
bottom line is because the Lord has called us to it. Here is a more detailed answer:
1. Adoption is a beautiful portrayal of God’s adoption of us. It is the gospel displayed in a real,
practical way.
2. There is a need.
There is a need domestically; there is a need internationally. There are birth-moms who choose not to parent, and children that cannot be cared for well and as
Christians, we feel compelled to open our lives, home and hearts to a child in
need. Abortions continue to rise.
This grieves us to no end.
Adoption is, in many ways, the antithesis of abortion.
3. We love children.
We both have always loved all children. We both have always saw beauty in multi-racial
families.
4. This is somewhat of an irrelevant point because I believe we
would adopt regardless of this, but I have very difficult pregnancies. 25 weeks of throwing up (sorry if TMI) and 24 hours a
day of extreme nauseousness, followed by other complications, trips to the ER, a scary labor and delivery of Isaiah and C-sections with both boys. We may have another
biological child someday, we may not- but I am not sure I could endure another
year of feeling like this while trying to care for the little ones, and run a
business alone. Certainly, things could have been worse of course and it was
worth every second to have Isaiah and Noah, but it puts a huge stress on our family
and our marriage to have me that sick for that long.
And so, we start this
journey. We can’t predict what
will happen, how we will change, grow, suffer, and experience joy, but we do
know that we will likely not be the same people at the end of this process. We know this is a life-long commitment
and this child will, without a doubt, be loved as much as Isaiah and Noah. We know that God goes before us. We know He has the child chosen for us,
created to be a part of our family.
We know He will carry us through this, we know we cannot do this
alone. We need Him and we need
you. We need your prayers, your
support, your encouragement on the tough days and your joyful celebration with
us on the wonderful days. If
you’re reading this, it is because we’ve shared this blog with you- which means
you’re an instrumental part of our lives.
And we are so excited for you to walk this journey with us.
For His glory and His praise,
Kate
-----
A friend of
ours posted this on facebook on “Orphan Sunday”, which is November 3rd
Nov 3rd.
“You see, He had given us
this desire and we knew we couldn't go wrong with being at the center of his
will. It wasn't about us and our comfort, or the money, or the time. It was
about these two precious ones that God see's as valuable, as loved, as
accepted. Two children who have great worth in the eyes of our Creator. Two
little ones whose lives have changed ours for the better, and who God has used
to allow us to know His heart better. I can't imagine life without them. It's
hard thinking about all of the kids who are still waiting. ‘There are 164.8
million needy children. And though at first glance that looks like a big
number, 2.1 billion people on this earth proclaim to be Christians. The truth
is that if only 8 percent of the Christians would care for one more child,
there would not be any statistics left.’To adopt a child is to follow the lead
of our God who has adopted so many.”
This was such a powerful
testimony of the beauty of adoption, I had to share…
-----
November 18, 2013
Last week, Jeremy and I
officially started our adoption process.
We went to a long meeting and learned details about the process;
everything from the timeline, the costs, the legal aspects and more. It was eye opening and if anything,
made us even more certain that He is calling us to this. We both walked away with such peace to
start this process. As they
discussed the financial aspects, I kept thinking, what better reason to
continue working hard, to put every cent we have towards something eternal, to
know that this is a beautiful life that we can love deeply and support
fully. As they mentioned that the
average wait time for a baby is over 20 months, I thought, it is YOUR timing,
God. It is YOUR way, YOUR will for
YOUR GLORY. And then, as Jeremy
and I prayed on the way home, I was overcome with love for this unborn child
that He has for us. With tears streaming down and a big smile on my face, I
felt such joy to know we are in His will for us, and that He has already given
Jeremy and I such a great love for this little one.
------
Feb 27th, 2014
Three months have passed
since I last wrote. We have been so busy with the holidays, traveling, Noah’s
birthday, activities, Noah’s dedication, work, Jeremy’s schooling and many
adoption related things. At this
point, we have completed our paperwork- this was hours of dedicated time
answering questions, making copies, completing questionnaires, getting
fingerprinted, having physicals, and more! We are also almost done with the home study process- one
week from now we will be done with that portion of this long adventure. At times, this all feels surreal. It is hard to believe we will have a
baby in our arms at the end of this journey…which is really just the
beginning.
I have felt my faith
stretching and growing. One thing I am certain about adoption is that this
journey forces you to surrender entirely to Him. It can’t be in my way, and my timing-
it is completely out of my control.
When I was pregnant, I felt like I had some sense of control. Of course,
ultimately, I had far less control than I can imagine- but I knew the general
date the boys would arrive, how to prepare, the steps to take. This is foreign territory. My heart feels like it is starting to
prepare to have another little baby- and yet this could be many, many months or
years before it comes to fruition.
Thankfully, with the two little boys, and life in general, I feel my
days are so full that time, for now, is flying.
We continue to press on to
this calling- and love the baby that grows in our hearts-
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